The Nagging Minutes of the Earliest Hour

This is a late night cry in the wilderness. A brain too old, too stressed, and too weary is fighting back with insomnia. The brutality, banality, and hypocracy of the world has triumphed for the moment over hope. For the moment only [I think!] and due to having to sustain total concentration, when I no longer have mental margin, for 8 solid hours, I have lost reason to care about my fellow human beings.

There is a paralysis against evil that is overcoming us all. We are not threatened with death or prison if we protest, if we villify, if we vent our outrage over evil. We don't need to be threatened. We are already imprisoned and this is death-in-life. What we say about the malefactors is irrelevant, so we are now all "good Germans", averting our eyes from the poison gas showers and the cremation ovens by default and not by fear ridden choice.

What seizes me in moments like this is a slice of desire for gotterdamerung. I am tormented with the irrational and horrible craving for the new spike in gas prices to crack the U. S. economy like an eggshell. I rejoice in the gathering battle for humanity which we will soon be waging against Nature, as Nature proceeds to thin our numbers in the most brutal ways imaginable to get some space to rebuild the rest of life on this planet. And the colors I wear at the tailgate party and during the office over-the-weekend game pool are not the colors of Homo Sapiens.

Homo Sapiens needs to learn better. The U.S. public, particularly the one-third of it who cheer this evil on when they have time from talking on their cell phones and driving their SUV's with the oval "W" sticker on them, needs to learn better. And learn the hard way.

These are brain vapors needing release. The bedrock of my vows are unaltered as these vapors clear. But I still have my good and powerful friends, whose pictures I have placed here on occasion, and me and my friends have a particular vow to obliterate the obstacles to true compassion and loving kindness by any means necessary.

By any means necessary.

Though such a thought is sobering, in that thought I take comfort in having such friends.